Forums Forums General Forums A - Z Leisure & Hobbies No social life at 53!!

Hi,apart from work and hospital(my wife has a number of medical problems)we have no social life,one of the problems is because my wife is ill and disabled we can't commit to regular events and we can't invite work friends home because we have dogs,one or two of them are a bit overprotective.I often don't finish work until 9 or 8 in the evening most weeks,any ideas as to what to do meet other people?,my wife is painfully shy and I'm the opposite but we only talk to each other most of the time which means we both get a bit fed up.Any suggestions?

Join a social club?

Sorry if this sounds stupid but what is a social club?

Your in a difficult situation for a social life and I understand about the dogs and visitors. I guess its about building relationships with other dog lovers who are happy to visit. I do tend to put my dogs in the back room when someone comes .I'm a full time carer myself so I know how restricting it can be re a social life. I do spend more time on line than I have ever done.
I've lost a few so called friends because of my situation but my real friends still visit. I wish you well, You will find a way round it and hopefully there will be a few more suggestions for you on here

I think your really brave to come on here and say this.I do hope you can get good advice on here .Maybe start with your wife go out with her and the dogs walking.Its surprising how many poeple stop and talk to you.Also another option is sit down with your wife and search the internet and see what social events suit you both.If you both like walking and fresh air there are a few walking groups in the Wirral.

Just that mate, a club you join which has regular social events and you have to be a member so you'll see the same people etc.

Where are you and I'll make a suggestion.

Glad you came on here to post this, a brave post. Perhaps there are some groups around your wifes disability perhaps. Maybe you could ask from suggestions from the workers you are in contact with at the hospital. Maybe join a diners club? I hope someone comes up with something for you, best of luck.

Are your dogs overprotective when you are out I wonder. If they are safe in public and if your wife is able to either walk or self wheelchair, a local fun dog show/village fair in the daytime might be a start in meeting like minded people. There are a few around in the Summer.What about car boot sales , you get chatting sometimes to folk there (have to leave dogs at home for that).
If the dogs are the only problem in having people round, like jerdubig , I would put mine in a different room for a couple of hours too.
Doesnt sound like you have much spare time at all. Dont know how old you are , so this may not be appropriate , but there are also various public coffee mornings in most areas in church halls and the like (not religious gatherings) . Those will tend to be over 60's local people often dying for a chat who may take the pressure of your wife feeling obliged to start conversations till she knows someone better.
Wonder if either or both of you are periodically able to volunteer for a charity shop once a month or something --always good for meeting folk .Lastly , when you do get a couple of days or bit longer breaks, ---take to caravanning , rent or your own, its a great way of meeting people and socializing.Can be local to Wirral (Thurstaston for instance)so you are near the hospital. Really tough to break out when you're in a position like yours. Wish you the best of luck.

I dont know what part of Wirral you are from Patchthedog but if are in Birkenhead area, there is an excellent Church club on North Road, Saturday nights are good nights, loads of friendly people and a BAR too, Take a look in sometime...

Brian

Are you involved with Carers Assosiations? They have regular meetings/ coffee mornings/ outings etc

Best of luck.

Unless we know the severity of your wifes medical problems,(which you may not wish to disclose), or where you are living , we can only offer suggestions as Venice has done.
A few more suggestions would include possibly joining one of the many 'Friends' groups we have on Wirral. e.g Friends of the Ferries, Friends of Vale Park, Friends of Hilbre Island. There are so many of them. Maybe you would prefer a Conservation Group. PLenty of those too. e.g Barn Owl Conservation, Village Conservation, Butterfly Conservation.
If you are interested in Theatre, there are many small theatre groups who would alwas be looking for volunteers. e.g making cosstumes, make up, scenery, props. programmes, selling tickets.
Once you maybe decide, you could make a post on here and I am sure many would then help to guide you toward your next step. Fingers crossed.

PM Sent

Again, depending on the severity of your wife's disability, there may be the options of 'gym buddies'? I'm not sure wether any gyms on the Wirral take part in this (I've recently moved to Telford, and that's we're I've seen in), but basically it's a volunteer, or group of volunteers, who help people with disabilities find some kind of excercise that suits them. If its something you and the wife, and a few other people can do together, it may help to meet new people? And if you work late, it could be something to fill the mornings??

And if this isn't a project already happening on the Wirral, maybe you and a few of the other guys on here could help to start it??