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Sorry, the foregoing was terrible. Something to do with the fact that I'm doing a depth reduction/calibration test on a bottle of Talisker at the moment !!


I'll get my coat........

Talisker is yummy
I'd love some in my tummy
But it's sat with Pinzgauer
I'll be there in an hour!

One fine day in the middle of the night
Two dead men got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords and shot each other

im pissed and posting on wiki
tomorrow i should throw a sickie
the pub kicked me out, so i supose its quite handy
that i got home and found my brandy.

my apologies!!!!!

LOL

Annoying OS
Ready
>10 Print "I know a poem that'll get on your nerves"
>20 GOTO 10
>RUN

I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves I know a poem that'll get on your nerves................

*so runs* LOL

Colgo, is that a Spike Milligan?? Recognise the verse!

I saw a little worm,
A wriggling on its belly,
He looked so cute and gracefull
I squashed him with my welly!!
SM

Soundlad, can you do that in an annoyingly squeeky voice???

Mary had a little lamb.....
The midwife ran a mile....!

Mary had a little bike,
She rode it back to front,
And every time the peddals went round,
They went right up her ----!!
(family show!!)

There was a young man from Devizes
Whose balls were of two different sizes
One was so small, it was no ball at all
But the other one won several prizes.

That's it ! You asked for this.....

The boy stood on the burning deck
Wishing he hadn't been born.
His Father said it wouldn't have happened,
If the condom hadn't torn !!


Almost hit bottom on the Talisker now.

Could well be, It's just one of those things thats been in my head for years along with this other classic:-

A Robin rested on my sill
In the morning lull
I closed the window slowly
And crushed its little skull.

Sorry

Nonsense rhymes

Yankie Doodle went to town
riding on a rocket.
He Stuck his finger up his butt
and found some Hersheys Chocolate.

(to the rainbow theme tune)
Up above the streets and houses,
bungle flying high,
Lifted up his hairy leg
and pissed in Geoffrey' s eye!

more ? yer why not

Jack and Jill
went up the hill
to smoke some marijuana.
Jack got high,
unziped his fly,
And Jill said "my my"

Row Row Row your boat
gently down the stream
Throw your teacher overboard
and listen to her scream.

To the tune of Frerra Jaque.
R2D2, R2D2,
C3-PO, C3-PO,
Obi Wan Kanobe, Obi Wan Kanobe,
Han Solo, Han Solo.

Ok i'll give up LOL

There once was a man called Ghandi
Who went to the pub for a shandy
He wiped off the froth
With his loincloth
And the barman said "Ooh that's handy"

There was a baboon,
Who one afternoon,
Said,"I think i will fly to the sun!",
So with two great palms strapped to his arms,
He started his take off run!

Mile after mile he galloped in style,
But never once left the ground,
"You`r running too slow", said a passing old crow,
"Try reaching the speed of sound!"

He put on a spurt,
By god how it hurt,
The soles of his feet caught fire,
There were great clouds of steam,
As he ran thru a stream
But he still didnt get any higher!

Spike Milligan
A mental genius of our time!!

my ex is dumped
but not forgotten
smelled 'er clout
twas fu**in rotten!

Mary had a little lamb, she thought it rather silly, she threw it up into the air and caught it by the >
Willy was a watch dog sitting on the grass, along came a be and stung him on the >
Ask no questions tell no lies I saw a policeman playing with his >
Flies are a nuisance, bees are worse, this is the end of my silly little verse.

Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon.
10,000 volts went up it's ass
And turned it's wool to nylon

Mary had a little lamb,
Her father shot it dead.
Now Mary takes the lamb to school
Between two hunks of bread

Mary had a little lamb,
The doctor was surprised.
When Old McDonald had a farm,
The poor guy nearly died