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Posted By: Elyth Jack - 24th Apr 2014 8:52pm
Hello

For the past year my male cat has become gradually more aggressive towards one of my female cats. They are all neutered. He is perfectly fine with one but with the other he just peruses her and stalks her. Recently I ended up taking my female cat to the vets because he attacked her she was bleeding and it became infected. My female cat basically hides in the draw all day and won't come out. I mentioned this to the vet and all they said was make sure she has some where to hide.

Anyway due to this issue I am trying to find a new home for my 3 year old male cat, one without any other pets. He is a housecat and really clumsly he is more like a small dog to be honest. I really don't want to have to do this but I have tried to resolve this for the past year and I feel so sorry for my female cat hiding away all day. I have to lock my male cat in the bathroom just so she will come out and use the litter tray as she is that scared of him. The RSPCA won't take him, I wanted him to go to them so I know they would find a good home for him but I guess I have to do it myself.

I also feel harsh on him too because he has never been alone he has always had my other 2 as company, ah it's just a nightmare.

If anyone is interested please let me know, I really don't know what else I can do frown


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Posted By: Heswall1958 Re: Jack - 25th Apr 2014 7:42am
Arrhh, I feel for you. Just make sure he goes to a good home.
Posted By: Uffda Re: Jack - 25th Apr 2014 2:09pm
I'm so sorry you find yourself in this situation. I can't imagine having to rehome one of my cats but it's not fair on your female cat - she must be really unhappy.
He looks a lovely lad. Have you tried :- http://bootehomeforcats.org.uk/ They are based in Liverpool and I got my ginger wuss from them.
Or check out the Cat Chat website as they list Merseyside rehoming centres.
http://www.catchat.org/adoption/mersey.html
Good luck.
Posted By: venice Re: Jack - 25th Apr 2014 4:11pm
Poor you , I can sympathize with you having to make that choice even though Im not a cat person . He will likely find a home quickly being the popular colour he is, so worth putting him on rescue lists whilst you still have him, if nothing comes of your own efforts. Good luck.
Posted By: Elizabeth Re: Jack - 25th Apr 2014 4:19pm
I have two cats (aged 12 & 13) for years they have just about tolerated each other. Initially they were very pally together then when the girl cat turned one year old, the tom cat became very aggressive towards her. I was told it was due to her being of reproductive age even though she had been spayed. She now still has trouble defending herself against the tom cat and she is scared of him but other than that she is a very happy cat. She just gives him a wide berth when passing him by.

I am sad to learn that you're planning on giving the tom cat away due to the situation. I wonder if it were two children that didn't get along, what would you do then?

It will get better, although they likely won't be friendly with one another, but they'll come to realise that they live in the same house and that's that.
Get a water pistol and if you see the tom cat making aggressive moves towards the girl, squirt him to take his attention elsewhere.
Posted By: ZipperClub Re: Jack - 25th Apr 2014 4:29pm
Send the tom to a Psychiatrist as well...
Posted By: Elyth Re: Jack - 26th Apr 2014 7:22am
thanks for the links i will have a look.

to elizabeth its not getting better ive tried the water trick and it does not work. my female has had to put up with this for a year. cats are not children you can talk to children so using that as an example is not good. i am not doing this lightly i love him to bit but its not fair
Posted By: bobypam Re: Jack - 26th Apr 2014 1:30pm
Hello there, You may have read this,but just in case.


Spay/neuter the bully cat, and any other cats in the home, if the felines aren’t already altered. Unaltered cats, with hormones running rampant, are much more prone to bad behavior, including bullying and other types of aggression.

2
Add litter boxes. The litter box is a big deal in the cats’ world and much fighting and bullying in multi-cat households center on access to the litter box. The general rule is that you should have one more litter box than you do cats. This means, for example, that if you have four cats, you should have fiver litter boxes.

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3
Place the litter boxes in different locations throughout the house. If the bully cat is guarding one box and not allowing the other cats access to it, the other cats can go to one of the other litter boxes in a different location. The bully cat can’t be everywhere.

4
Provide escapes at different levels. Cats like height. If the cats can get away from each other--and especially the bully cat--stress will be reduced. Providing these escapes can be done in several ways. Adding cat trees is the most expensive options. Simply cleaning off bookshelves at different heights, or making the top of the refrigerator available as an escape, works equally well.

5
Establish several feeding areas, if you have food out for your cats at all times. This will allow other cats to access food and water when the bully cat is guarding a particular area. If you have set feeding times for your cats, feed the bully cat in a separate room where he can’t antagonize the other cats while they are eating.

6
Set out water bowls in several areas. This will allow the other cats to drink if the bully cat is guarding a particular water bowl.

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Read more: http://www.ehow.com/how_5858029_stop-cat-bullying.html#ixzz2zzxr99O1
Posted By: Elizabeth Re: Jack - 26th Apr 2014 4:33pm
Originally Posted by Elyth
thanks for the links i will have a look.

to elizabeth its not getting better ive tried the water trick and it does not work. my female has had to put up with this for a year. cats are not children you can talk to children so using that as an example is not good. i am not doing this lightly i love him to bit but its not fair


I know you're not doing it lightly, and I know how much you love your tom cat too, all I was saying is that I have been through the same myself, and the thought of re homing one of my cats would be a nightmare situation. Mine are old cats now but as I said, eventually the tom cat became slightly more subdued in his attacks on the girl cat, she still cowers when she sees him though.
I never understood what exactly happened between them all those years ago because as youngsters they would sleep in the same box and stayed in the same cage when we put them in the cattery for 2 weeks whilst on hols. The animosity was almost an overnight change.
Posted By: Elyth Re: Jack - 26th Apr 2014 7:48pm
Yea that's exactly what happened here it just seemed to change over night a year ago. I just worry one day I will come home and she is seriously hurt. After having to take her to the vets already It's just always on my mind
Posted By: stu6278 Re: Jack - 27th Apr 2014 9:34am
Sorry to hear Elyth. We have similar trouble with our ginger Tom bullying our other female cat - like yours they're both neutered so we really didn't expect it to be like this. He has a tendency to stalk her although she will sometimes stand up to him and can give as good as she gets.

Have you tried a product such as Feliway? It's a plug in diffuser that's supposed to calm them down. We noticed a slight difference (nothing massively dramatic) although it might work better depending on the cats in question. Worth a go.
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