Today I found a piece of jewellery on the ground in the vicinity of the shops on Woodchurch Rd (near Home-Bargains, Sainsbury's etc). If you've lost something recently, describe it and I'll be happy to return it to it's rightful owner.

Chances of the owner being on here is basically non-existant. Stick it in the cop shop.

Nothing like being optimistic, eh?

But I have handed it in, and if anyone is able to describe it, I will be happy to say where

Elizabeth take no notice of Zipper, he is an old fart :-)

I`m just envious of Dillys new business adventure..

See Elizabeth, what a shellfish man Zipper is :-)

Dilly, you left your lights on again, naughty man..

Notice on the door at the Police Station
"Will the owner please form a queue"