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Ageing #995822
22nd Dec 2015 1:34pm
22nd Dec 2015 1:34pm
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 4,868
shropshire
chriskay Offline OP
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chriskay  Offline OP
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shropshire
I'm putting it here because I can't think of anywhere else.
This story is heartbreaking. As someone who has made a positive decision not to be dependent on my children (and I've got what I need to end my life when I feel the time is right), it doesn't personally affect me, but there's a lot of ageing people which it will. I'm actually surprised; I thought the culture in China treasured its old people.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-35155548


Carpe diem.
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Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #995828
22nd Dec 2015 2:42pm
22nd Dec 2015 2:42pm
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 2,176
wallasey
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casper Online content
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wallasey
Looks like they have read about Thatchers kids, who would believe they have adopted Tory policies in deepest China, look after yourselves first, take what you can and kick those who are struggling back down the ladder.

Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #995831
22nd Dec 2015 3:28pm
22nd Dec 2015 3:28pm
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 13,577
Birkenhead
diggingdeeper Offline

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diggingdeeper  Offline

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Birkenhead
At least the state is opening old peoples homes in China, most of ours have been closed.

I agree with Chris in that you should burden your kids as little as possible, what is the point of slowing down other people's lives, surely you want your kids to lead a more fulfilling life.


The further you are down the pay scale, the more 'essential' you are when the s--- hits the fan... Sue Farbysmith 2020

Insults are engendered from vulgar minds, like toadstools from a dunghill - Charles Caleb Colton

We don't do charity in Germany, We pay taxes. Charity is a failure of governments' responsibilities - Henning Wehn
Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #995846
22nd Dec 2015 5:10pm
22nd Dec 2015 5:10pm
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 17,398
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granny Offline
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granny  Offline
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Chinese do not have compassion, or an understanding of empathy.

Cold blooded and de-humanised in my opinion. Could be due to Communism, but I think it's in the generations of too many people and poverty. (whatever that has resulted from).

Very sad situation.


Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.
~Chief Seattle
Re: Ageing [Re: granny] #995861
22nd Dec 2015 5:41pm
22nd Dec 2015 5:41pm
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 4,036
Heswallish
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fish5133 Offline
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Heswallish
Originally Posted by granny
Chinese do not have compassion, or an understanding of empathy.

Cold blooded and de-humanised in my opinion. Could be due to Communism, but I think it's in the generations of too many people and poverty. (whatever that has resulted from).

Very sad situation.


Would think it goes back way before communism. A friend of mine with Chinese parents thinks its a lot to do with culture ancestry and religious beliefs going back thousands of years. Things are changing over there but persecution is keeping a cap on it. They have imported westernism on a big scale which is going to bring in a load more problems as well as some plusses.

Re: Ageing [Re: diggingdeeper] #995865
22nd Dec 2015 5:55pm
22nd Dec 2015 5:55pm
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 2,176
wallasey
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casper Online content
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wallasey
Yes I agree with you on not burdening the kids, but there is a difference with not burdening and basically being thrown to the wolves.

Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #995926
23rd Dec 2015 12:24am
23rd Dec 2015 12:24am
Joined: Jul 2011
Posts: 3,621
Wirral
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venice Offline

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Wirral
I dont agree with 'burdening the kids' TOO much, but I think its good for the younger generation to shoulder some responsibility for older members of the family .Makes the former less self centred, nicer more understanding people.Needs to be a balance though, of course and not all 'children' are in a position to help their parents anyway. The situation in China sounds dreadfully sad.

Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #995929
23rd Dec 2015 1:17am
23rd Dec 2015 1:17am
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 19,446
Here.
RUDEBOX Offline
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RUDEBOX  Offline
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I think my Grandad at 95 years of age is the only one who pays for his care, in his Old Peoples Home. Does not seem fair, I get that!!

He gets no preferential treatment from other state funded residents. My sister did try to encourage him to move to a 'posh home' but being a penny pinching,life-long Tory he won't. Even now at his age.

People are strange.


Mia Mabel

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh! Jer-e-my Cor-byn

Re: Ageing [Re: RUDEBOX] #996016
23rd Dec 2015 7:33pm
23rd Dec 2015 7:33pm
Joined: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,626
Birkenhead
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jimbob Offline

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jimbob  Offline

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Birkenhead
as what you call a penny pinching life long tory, he has made sure he is Not a financial burden on others. Nothing wrong in that outlook on life.


Ships that pass in the night, seldom seen and soon forgoten
Re: Ageing [Re: jimbob] #996044
23rd Dec 2015 9:48pm
23rd Dec 2015 9:48pm
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 19,446
Here.
RUDEBOX Offline
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RUDEBOX  Offline
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Originally Posted by jimbob
as what you call a penny pinching life long tory, he has made sure he is Not a financial burden on others. Nothing wrong in that outlook on life.
I agree but he could be funding a 'better' experience for himself. Now, at 95 is surely the time to 'splash out' and live a little?


Mia Mabel

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh! Jer-e-my Cor-byn

Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay] #996075
24th Dec 2015 9:56am
24th Dec 2015 9:56am
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 17,398
Wirral
granny Offline
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granny  Offline
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It's nice to know he can still make up his own mind, without being pushed around ! That is what the topic is about....and he wouldn't have a better experience. Still sit in a chair all day and talk to the next man who's lost his marbles.


Humankind has not woven the web of life. We are but one thread within it. Whatever we do to the web, we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.
~Chief Seattle
Re: Ageing [Re: granny] #996080
24th Dec 2015 10:24am
24th Dec 2015 10:24am
Joined: May 2012
Posts: 2,176
wallasey
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casper Online content
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casper  Online Content
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wallasey
Originally Posted by granny
It's nice to know he can still make up his own mind, without being pushed around ! That is what the topic is about....and he wouldn't have a better experience. Still sit in a chair all day and talk to the next man who's lost his marbles.


We go to visit my mum in law who is in a care home, it is so depressing to see them all sat around some are unable to communicate because of acute deafness or speech problems, some suffer from dementure, most are asleep, mum in law suffers from slight dementure, sometimes she is lucid other times she rambles or doesnt know who we are, there are a couple of ladies who are bright and funny and we interact with them if mum is asleep, but not much of an existence for them all, only thing that can be said is that they are warm and fed.


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