WikiWirral values you and your opinion.
Forum Stats
12256 Members
65 Forums
72905 Topics
982957 Posts
183 posts in the last 24hrs
Max Online: 7831 @ 8th Apr 2013 4:18pm
Who's Online - Click Me
88 registered (alan128, 12 invisible), 1878 Guests and 399 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Social Media : Follow Us


(Views 7days)This Weeks Most Read
Boom : New Ferry Explosion 2602
Death at Leasowe Train Station 532
Huge Gas Explosion in New Ferry Sat 25/03/17 449
Planet Earth Tonight 292
Has Talktalk been hacked yet again? 264
Snowhite's Bird Rescue 219
Reclaimed floorboards needed. 214
Activate Trip Computer on Astra J 129
Another Terrorist Attack ? -London Islington 110
KEYS found 88
New General Forums
hi
by norma67
26th Mar 2017 7:42pm
Clocks go Forward
by Mark
25th Mar 2017 3:01pm
Mannequin Challenge AKA MRI Scan
by fish5133
24th Mar 2017 11:20am
Surely the most honest add.....
by buddy
20th Mar 2017 5:43pm
New Wirral History
William Bernard's building, Birkenhead
by yoller
20th Mar 2017 4:27pm
1882 Plan of the borough of Birkenhead and Wards
by Dave_Wood
19th Mar 2017 11:57am
New Brighton Coop
by Mike_White
9th Mar 2017 12:48pm
Tranmere High School for Girls 1882 Chesnut Grove
by sarah708
6th Mar 2017 8:23pm
Whetstone Lane, Birkenhead
by MoretonExpat
6th Mar 2017 8:04am
Forum Tips
Photo Gallery Forums
Birkenhead Transport Museum 24th Feb 2017
fireworks on the Mersey last night
Topic Replies
Astra Car Mats
by cartoonhead
Today at 08:04 AM
Article 50
by diggingdeeper
Today at 04:11 AM
live webcam from africa, a must see
by granny
Today at 01:24 AM
Activate Trip Computer on Astra J
by chris123
Yesterday at 08:53 PM
Will It Work For You
by granny
Yesterday at 08:12 PM
Sky HD 2TB box
by chris123
Yesterday at 06:02 PM
195 65 R15 91H Car Tyre
by chris123
Yesterday at 05:57 PM
hi
by Dilly
28th Mar 2017 11:36pm
'March' Photo Competition.
by snowshoes
28th Mar 2017 10:58pm
March
M Tu W Th F Sa Su
1 2 3 4 5
6 7 8 9 10 11 12
13 14 15 16 17 18 19
20 21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31
Recent Posts : What's On ?
Planet Earth Tonight
by Excoriator
26th Mar 2017 10:31am
Lee and Cragg Quarries - Bacup
by Mark
23rd Mar 2017 7:43am
Topic Options
Rate This Topic
#783746 - 7th Apr 2013 4:07pm Professional mourners
eddtheduck Offline
Forum Addict

Registered: 21st Feb 2011
Posts: 1334
Loc: happy place
WORRIED that nobody will show up at your funeral? Look no further than Rent A Mourner, an Essex-based company providing sad people for funerals when (as its website delicately puts it) "there may be a low turnout expected".

scared you'll die alone? Don't be, Rent A Mourner will see to your funeral guest list

Bookings are also on the up because people want something more dramatic than a mousey British send-off. They want sobbing, hair tearing and breast beating, in the way of excitable foreigners.

We had professional mourners in Victorian times, known as "mutes". They looked tragic during the service and doubled as waiters for the wake. Dickens despised them and in the funeral in Martin Chuzzlewit he describes: "Two mutes… looking as mournful as could reasonably be expected of men with such a thriving job in hand."

Yes, a career in professional mourning could be the answer. Short hours, free booze and all the ham sandwiches you can eat.

link


Edited by eddtheduck (7th Apr 2013 4:09pm)
_________________________
I'm an Unipug

Top
Jobs : Advertising
Click me for more Information......

* * * Rapid Hydraulics - Hydraulic Hose Repairs * * *
Now Advertise with WikiWirral.
WikiWirral stats 35,000 Page Views a Day +500 Search Engines.. Click Me
#783835 - 7th Apr 2013 7:09pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: eddtheduck]
pegsgirl Offline
Addict

Registered: 29th Oct 2011
Posts: 235
Loc: wirral
Ha ha, this so made me laugh!! My biggest fear is that my church is empty at my funeral, so my daughter said, "don't worry mum we will rent some mourners"". I will pass her the link just in case. laffin laffin

Top
#783906 - 7th Apr 2013 9:53pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: eddtheduck]
RUDEBOX Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Aug 2008
Posts: 19087
Loc: Bob Land
I would rather have genuine 'mourners' at my 'Do'. My fear is that my husband would be so consumed with grief that he won't actually tell anybody- especially online- that I'm dead!!!

Peeps would just think that I've had my internet cut off!!!
_________________________
Mia Mabel


Top
#783914 - 7th Apr 2013 10:09pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: eddtheduck]
Rambo Offline
Addict

Registered: 4th Jul 2012
Posts: 230
Loc: Usually at work!
I honestly couldn't give a flying fook if no one turned up to my funeral, most of the 'mourners' would only be there to make sure I was really dead anyway!

Top
#783917 - 7th Apr 2013 10:12pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: eddtheduck]
TheDr Offline
Forum Master

Registered: 23rd Feb 2010
Posts: 2631
Loc: Wirral
I was thinking about not going to mine.....

Now THAT would mess things up a bit.

Top
#783919 - 7th Apr 2013 10:14pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: Rambo]
RUDEBOX Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Aug 2008
Posts: 19087
Loc: Bob Land
Originally Posted By: Rambo
I honestly couldn't give a flying fook if no one turned up to my funeral, most of the 'mourners' would only be there to make sure I was really dead anyway!
Bollox-just leave your recipes x
_________________________
Mia Mabel


Top
#783923 - 7th Apr 2013 10:19pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: RUDEBOX]
RUDEBOX Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Aug 2008
Posts: 19087
Loc: Bob Land
Rambo- I designate you Press Officer regardingmy death!!!!
Originally Posted By: RUDEBOX
I would rather have genuine 'mourners' at my 'Do'. My fear is that my husband would be so consumed with grief that he won't actually tell anybody- especially online- that I'm dead!!!

Peeps would just think that I've had my internet cut off!!!

_________________________
Mia Mabel


Top
#783937 - 7th Apr 2013 11:22pm Re: Professional mourners [Re: RUDEBOX]
reddragon Offline
Forum Guardian

Registered: 22nd Mar 2010
Posts: 3902
Loc: bromborough/wirral
if I knew the exact date / time and location of my death Id ensure I was nowhere near that point at that time
_________________________
ALWAYS REMEMBER BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU:::::::: Have a nice day and an even better one tomorrow

Top
#783969 - 8th Apr 2013 7:30am Re: Professional mourners [Re: reddragon]
j_demo Online   Know_it_all
Forum Addict

Registered: 4th Nov 2011
Posts: 1867
Loc: Wallasey/New Brighton
Originally Posted By: reddragon
if I knew the exact date / time and location of my death Id ensure I was nowhere near that point at that time

you clearly have never seen 'final destination'

Top

Moderator:  Mod 
Random Wirral Images

Click to View Topic.
Newest Topics
Activate Trip Computer on Astra J
by chris123
Yesterday at 06:06 PM
Will It Work For You
by granny
Yesterday at 08:26 AM
Death at Leasowe Train Station
by Mark
27th Mar 2017 10:02pm
KEYS found
by rocks
26th Mar 2017 11:48pm
hi
by norma67
26th Mar 2017 7:42pm
For Sale & Free
Sky HD 2TB box
by chris123
Yesterday at 06:02 PM
Astra Car Mats
by chris123
Yesterday at 05:59 PM
195 65 R15 91H Car Tyre
by chris123
Yesterday at 05:57 PM
boxed 10 inch tablet for sale
by stumpyduck
26th Mar 2017 7:12pm
various fly reels and boxes of fly's
by brady
25th Mar 2017 10:48am
Featured Member
Registered: 1st Jan 2011
Posts: 166
Newest Members
nickyrob32, GeorgeHand, BoilerEngineer, flipmodefly, Noize
12256 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
No Birthdays
New Wirral Info
Planet Earth Tonight
by granny
25th Mar 2017 11:50am
Reclaimed floorboards needed.
by Gold_Moon
25th Mar 2017 10:45am
Has Talktalk been hacked yet again?
by Habdab
24th Mar 2017 10:25am
What does this all mean?
by venice
22nd Mar 2017 12:20pm
black contiboard locally?
by fish5133
21st Mar 2017 9:30pm
News : New Topics
Article 50
by granny
Yesterday at 11:13 PM
Death at Leasowe Train Station
by Mark
27th Mar 2017 10:02pm
KEYS found
by rocks
26th Mar 2017 11:48pm
Another Terrorist Attack ? -London Islington
by fish5133
26th Mar 2017 3:03pm
Huge Gas Explosion in New Ferry Sat 25/03/17
by Dogwalker59
26th Mar 2017 10:36am
New Enthusiast Forums
Activate Trip Computer on Astra J
by chris123
Yesterday at 06:06 PM
Will It Work For You
by granny
Yesterday at 08:26 AM
Snowhite's Bird Rescue
by diggingdeeper
26th Mar 2017 2:44am
Offset number plates
by venice
23rd Mar 2017 1:24am
File too large
by Dilly
20th Mar 2017 10:41am
(Views 24hrs)Trending Newest Topics
Activate Trip Computer on Astra J 130
Article 50 50
Wirral Sunrise Sunset
Sunrise Thu 6:48am
Sunset Thu 7:44pm
Local Time Thu 9:55am
WikiWirral Can . . . .
Advertising Click me
To Advertise with
Wikiwirral Click Me