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#276974 - 19th Dec 2008 2:57pm Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign
MissGuided Offline

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Registered: 18th Jul 2008
Posts: 9995
Loc: Back of the wardrobe
"A police force launched a Christmas 'drink-drivel' campaign today - warning that too much boozing will leave revellers lost for words.

Officers in Ipswich, Suffolk, listed phrases that are 'absolutely impossible' to say when drunk, including 'Good evening, officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?'.

The poster campaign lists 'innovative', 'preliminary' and 'cinnamon' as words that are difficult to say in an inebriated state.

And 'specificity, 'passive-aggressive disorder' and 'transubstantiate' are classed as very difficult to master.

But, according to the poster, the nine 'absolutely impossible' phrases for drunks are:

* Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you;
* Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing;
* Sorry, but you're not really my type;
* No kebab for me, thank you;
* I'm not interested in fighting you;
* Good evening, officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?;
* Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no rhythm;
* Where is the nearest toilet? I can't possibly vomit in the street;
* I must be going home now - I have work in the morning

Inspector Becky Kidd-Stanton, operations inspector for Ipswich, said: 'The drink-drivel poster campaign appeals to people to come to Ipswich to have a good time and not to spoil it for others.

'It highlights how people behave differently after consuming alcohol.'

Police are also handing out 900 lollipops as part of their attempt to tackle festive disorder.

'It is harder to verbally abuse or fight with people with a lollipop in your mouth or hand,' said Ms Kidd-Stanton."


I like that last bit about lollipops. Let's see who has trouble with 'specificity, 'passive-aggressive disorder' and 'transubstantiate' after this evening!! smile
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#276975 - 19th Dec 2008 3:10pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: MissGuided]
StuyMac Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 24th Nov 2003
Posts: 12002
Loc: Wirralshire
Maybe they should hand lollipops out as you leave any club / Pub at anytime of the year.... think

....Actually, I see an evolution of that being another problem by way of people getting a beating by lollipop raftl

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#277019 - 19th Dec 2008 7:30pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: StuyMac]
MGCraig Offline
AlfaHolic
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Registered: 16th Apr 2006
Posts: 5488
Loc: Spital
LolliPop in the eye...

Stuy youve stated something here..you should be proud. A form of aggression that Toddlers can enjoy as well..
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#277022 - 19th Dec 2008 7:51pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: MGCraig]
Beemertastic Offline
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Registered: 16th Oct 2007
Posts: 1113
Loc: wirral
hmmm...im sure you could class a lolipop as an offensive weapon...made or adapated to cause harm or injury?
come here sonny your nicked...
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#277027 - 19th Dec 2008 8:15pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Beemertastic]
MissGuided Offline

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Registered: 18th Jul 2008
Posts: 9995
Loc: Back of the wardrobe
You could bite it into a sharp point and stab someone in the face with it!!

depends how big they are - if it was one of these:

that would be good - chav silencer!
but then you'll get the chav females trying to do this:

whether they have 20lb of cellulite on their thighs or not!
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#277123 - 20th Dec 2008 12:47pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: MissGuided]
Beemertastic Offline
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Registered: 16th Oct 2007
Posts: 1113
Loc: wirral
eeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuugh...i cant just see that happening on conway street
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#277138 - 20th Dec 2008 1:54pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Beemertastic]
Davey_Martin Offline
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Registered: 17th Jul 2007
Posts: 2888
Loc: New Ferry
blimey, that isn't a good thought!

as for the lollipop thing, wot if ppl do get into a fight with a lollipop in their mouth? surely it increases their risk of choking? - brilliant! haha

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#277144 - 20th Dec 2008 2:01pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Davey_Martin]
Beemertastic Offline
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Registered: 16th Oct 2007
Posts: 1113
Loc: wirral
Originally Posted By: Davey_Martin
blimey, that isn't a good thought!

as for the lollipop thing, wot if ppl do get into a fight with a lollipop in their mouth? surely it increases their risk of choking? - brilliant! haha


they will just sue plod for millions then...you can just see it now...quote"""cuz it wasnt him..he is a lovely lad. He wouldn't harm anyone. It wasn't him. He is a hero. He's a hero around here. All the lads love him around here. It was the bizzies' fault. They saw it coming. But they didn't do anything to stop it. They just let it carry on""""
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#277146 - 20th Dec 2008 2:22pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Beemertastic]
Davey_Martin Offline
Forum Master

Registered: 17th Jul 2007
Posts: 2888
Loc: New Ferry
LOL!

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#277148 - 20th Dec 2008 2:36pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Davey_Martin]
DavidB Offline
Wiki Guide

Registered: 7th Dec 2003
Posts: 5599
Loc: Bebington, Wirral
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...
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#277152 - 20th Dec 2008 3:32pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: DavidB]
MissGuided Offline

Awesome
Wiki Guardian

Registered: 18th Jul 2008
Posts: 9995
Loc: Back of the wardrobe
Damn it - I forgot to test saying any of the big complicated words last night! I had texting trouble instead. One of my messages to my other half read, 'I am gettigoi a leban' - which when translated means 'I am getting a kebab' and another which stated, 'I am in the clipper getting ripped as a duck'. smack
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#277153 - 20th Dec 2008 3:35pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: DavidB]
Beemertastic Offline
Forum Addict

Registered: 16th Oct 2007
Posts: 1113
Loc: wirral
Originally Posted By: Station
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...

and whats that meant to mean?.......
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#277156 - 20th Dec 2008 3:39pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Beemertastic]
MissGuided Offline

Awesome
Wiki Guardian

Registered: 18th Jul 2008
Posts: 9995
Loc: Back of the wardrobe
Originally Posted By: Auditastic
Originally Posted By: Station
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...

and whats that meant to mean?.......

After your explanation of a recent apprehension of a man with a knife I truly believe police officers can have a sense of humour doh
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#277160 - 20th Dec 2008 4:07pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: MissGuided]
Beemertastic Offline
Forum Addict

Registered: 16th Oct 2007
Posts: 1113
Loc: wirral
haha...warped yes it may be...but some of us escaped the humor removal screening process in training....
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#277208 - 20th Dec 2008 6:23pm Re: Ipswich Police Drink-Drivel Campaign [Re: Beemertastic]
Wench Offline

H4H County Volunteer
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Registered: 9th Aug 2008
Posts: 8616
Loc: Second Circle of Hell.
You certainly did!!! I'll never look at a car door the same way again raftl
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