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#995822 - 22nd Dec 2015 1:34pm Ageing
chriskay Offline
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Registered: 25th Oct 2007
Posts: 4868
Loc: shropshire
I'm putting it here because I can't think of anywhere else.
This story is heartbreaking. As someone who has made a positive decision not to be dependent on my children (and I've got what I need to end my life when I feel the time is right), it doesn't personally affect me, but there's a lot of ageing people which it will. I'm actually surprised; I thought the culture in China treasured its old people.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-35155548
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#995828 - 22nd Dec 2015 2:42pm Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
casper Online   content
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Registered: 13th May 2012
Posts: 1231
Loc: wallasey
Looks like they have read about Thatchers kids, who would believe they have adopted Tory policies in deepest China, look after yourselves first, take what you can and kick those who are struggling back down the ladder.

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#995831 - 22nd Dec 2015 3:28pm Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
diggingdeeper Offline

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Registered: 9th Jul 2008
Posts: 9675
Loc: Birkenhead
At least the state is opening old peoples homes in China, most of ours have been closed.

I agree with Chris in that you should burden your kids as little as possible, what is the point of slowing down other people's lives, surely you want your kids to lead a more fulfilling life.
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In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act. George Orwell

When the debate is lost, slander becomes the tool of the loser. Socrates

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#995846 - 22nd Dec 2015 5:10pm Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
granny Offline

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Registered: 29th Jun 2011
Posts: 13681
Loc: Wirral
Chinese do not have compassion, or an understanding of empathy.

Cold blooded and de-humanised in my opinion. Could be due to Communism, but I think it's in the generations of too many people and poverty. (whatever that has resulted from).

Very sad situation.
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...and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.FN

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#995861 - 22nd Dec 2015 5:41pm Re: Ageing [Re: granny]
fish5133 Online   content
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Registered: 22nd Mar 2010
Posts: 2732
Loc: Heswallish
Originally Posted By: granny
Chinese do not have compassion, or an understanding of empathy.

Cold blooded and de-humanised in my opinion. Could be due to Communism, but I think it's in the generations of too many people and poverty. (whatever that has resulted from).

Very sad situation.


Would think it goes back way before communism. A friend of mine with Chinese parents thinks its a lot to do with culture ancestry and religious beliefs going back thousands of years. Things are changing over there but persecution is keeping a cap on it. They have imported westernism on a big scale which is going to bring in a load more problems as well as some plusses.

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#995865 - 22nd Dec 2015 5:55pm Re: Ageing [Re: diggingdeeper]
casper Online   content
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Registered: 13th May 2012
Posts: 1231
Loc: wallasey
Yes I agree with you on not burdening the kids, but there is a difference with not burdening and basically being thrown to the wolves.

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#995926 - 23rd Dec 2015 12:24am Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
venice Offline

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Registered: 21st Jul 2011
Posts: 2502
Loc: Wirral
I dont agree with 'burdening the kids' TOO much, but I think its good for the younger generation to shoulder some responsibility for older members of the family .Makes the former less self centred, nicer more understanding people.Needs to be a balance though, of course and not all 'children' are in a position to help their parents anyway. The situation in China sounds dreadfully sad.

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#995929 - 23rd Dec 2015 1:17am Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
RUDEBOX Offline
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Registered: 29th Aug 2008
Posts: 19050
Loc: Bob Land
I think my Grandad at 95 years of age is the only one who pays for his care, in his Old Peoples Home. Does not seem fair, I get that!!

He gets no preferential treatment from other state funded residents. My sister did try to encourage him to move to a 'posh home' but being a penny pinching,life-long Tory he won't. Even now at his age.

People are strange.
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Mia Mabel


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#996016 - 23rd Dec 2015 7:33pm Re: Ageing [Re: RUDEBOX]
jimbob Offline

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Registered: 26th Nov 2008
Posts: 1535
Loc: Birkenhead
as what you call a penny pinching life long tory, he has made sure he is Not a financial burden on others. Nothing wrong in that outlook on life.
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Ships that pass in the night, seldom seen and soon forgoten

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#996044 - 23rd Dec 2015 9:48pm Re: Ageing [Re: jimbob]
RUDEBOX Offline
Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Aug 2008
Posts: 19050
Loc: Bob Land
Originally Posted By: jimbob
as what you call a penny pinching life long tory, he has made sure he is Not a financial burden on others. Nothing wrong in that outlook on life.
I agree but he could be funding a 'better' experience for himself. Now, at 95 is surely the time to 'splash out' and live a little?
_________________________
Mia Mabel


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#996075 - 24th Dec 2015 9:56am Re: Ageing [Re: chriskay]
granny Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Jun 2011
Posts: 13681
Loc: Wirral
It's nice to know he can still make up his own mind, without being pushed around ! That is what the topic is about....and he wouldn't have a better experience. Still sit in a chair all day and talk to the next man who's lost his marbles.
_________________________
...and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.FN

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#996080 - 24th Dec 2015 10:24am Re: Ageing [Re: granny]
casper Online   content
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Registered: 13th May 2012
Posts: 1231
Loc: wallasey
Originally Posted By: granny
It's nice to know he can still make up his own mind, without being pushed around ! That is what the topic is about....and he wouldn't have a better experience. Still sit in a chair all day and talk to the next man who's lost his marbles.


We go to visit my mum in law who is in a care home, it is so depressing to see them all sat around some are unable to communicate because of acute deafness or speech problems, some suffer from dementure, most are asleep, mum in law suffers from slight dementure, sometimes she is lucid other times she rambles or doesnt know who we are, there are a couple of ladies who are bright and funny and we interact with them if mum is asleep, but not much of an existence for them all, only thing that can be said is that they are warm and fed.

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