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#927307 - 10th Feb 2015 10:01pm Secret Life of 4 Year Olds
Christo Offline
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Registered: 3rd Apr 2010
Posts: 113
Loc: Eastham
Has anybody else seen this programme?

Some lovely little cutie-pie kids on there, but 2 kids in particular I personally am not impressed with:-

Skylar - spoilt little diva, child of theatrical 'luvvies' who has spent too much time in adult-only company and perfecting the art of theatrical 'crocodile tears';

Chiam - obnoxious, selfish bully of a kid who looks as though he is force-fed steroids (he looks about 10, not 4!). Parents both work full-time and appear to give time everything he wants, rather than the guidance and parenting he so obviously needs. His parents must be so proud of him, watching this (not!).

I have never before taken an instant dislike to any child, but these two....!

Not really the kids' fault themselves, I suppose, but the parents really do need to take a step back and see what they're really doing to these children.

Rant now over! I feel much better now!

On a lighter note, one adorable little girl, playing 'Mummies and Daddies', having a make-believe telephone conversation: "Stop ringing me Richard, you are not the father"! (Jeremy Kyle, anyone?!)

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#927313 - 10th Feb 2015 10:24pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
Giggler Offline
Smartchild

Registered: 30th Oct 2012
Posts: 504
Loc: Wirral
I thought it was brilliant. I flicked through the channels and found it. Type of stuff I normally record. She was funny although obviously hears too much at home. She`ll have a social worker by Monday!
I`ve worked for people who treat their children as mini adults. I have seen the children regress because they were old before their time. Not good. Let them be children. It goes past in a flash.

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#927356 - 11th Feb 2015 11:25am Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
granny Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Jun 2011
Posts: 13848
Loc: Wirral
Ahhh I saw quite a bit of the programme, but didn't realise how old Chiam was until you said. I did wonder why he was in the programme.
That in itself is sad for some children, as they are always treated differently when they are bigger or older looking. They must have a difficult time and always expected to act older than they are.I think the same applies to our first borns too.

It was lovely to watch, but with twin granddaughters I have had great pleasure in listening to them chatter between themselves.
I do remember when one stamped on another child's foot at playschool, and the wrong twin was asked to apologise. She refused and got into trouble for refusing. When questioned by her mum about it, she said it wasn't her, that was why she wouldn't say sorry, her sister was responsible. Fair enough!

The grown ups aren't always right, are they ?
_________________________
...and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.FN

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#927364 - 11th Feb 2015 12:01pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
venice Offline

Forum Master

Registered: 21st Jul 2011
Posts: 2558
Loc: Wirral
Ha Ha , my grandchildren ALWAYS say it was the other one!!! --and both so plausible at the time too!

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#927369 - 11th Feb 2015 1:06pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
granny Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Jun 2011
Posts: 13848
Loc: Wirral
Must add that although Christo has taken an obvious dislike toward two of those children, they have only moved on one step from being babies. Four years of age is not a lot and as giggler says, allow them to be children and play their fantasy games.
How many children push a dolls pram now, how many children have a tricycle to ride along the pavements now, These were all part of contributing to development and awareness.
At the age of 4yrs. little children have learnt to understand a language, to speak it, clap. dance, walk,& run. To feed themselves, to go to the toilet, to ride a bike, to put their shoes on and get dressed. To paint, draw, and write their name, even social skills, trusting, honesty and so much more. They are the most wonderous gift of all, not to be catagorised as soon as they step foot into the classroom.
_________________________
...and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.FN

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#927375 - 11th Feb 2015 1:42pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: granny]
starakita Online   content

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Registered: 1st Oct 2009
Posts: 2202
Loc: between heaven & hell
I remember being in the ante natal clinic at Arrowe Park & this one child everyone else took a dislike to as he was being such a brat.Obviously expectant mum was being seen to & the Grandad was doing nothing about it.The kids were playing with the toys nicely & this kid was playing in one of those Little Tykes cars but every time he left it & another kid went near it,this one would come back bullying the kid that wanted to play in the car.Expectant mums blood pressures must of been high that day.
_________________________
no1s gonna keep me from u

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#927544 - 11th Feb 2015 9:22pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: granny]
Christo Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 3rd Apr 2010
Posts: 113
Loc: Eastham
My apologies, Granny - on looking back at my first post, I did come across as being an awful person and a little harsh on the two kids mentioned (with hindsight, perhaps I should not have used 'dislike', perhaps my dismay as to how they treated their peers). Please allow me to try and explain myself a little.

I am an older Mum to a just 2 year old. Like many other parents, I am trying to teach right from wrong, be nice to others (no biting, kicking, etc.), if someone is upset to give them a hug and comfort them, to praise good behaviour in abundance, to try to guide and discipline (where necessary) bad behaviour. My son has a lot of cousins who have all been brought up the same and who are all happy, well-adjusted little kids (so far!).

I am in the process of sorting out my son's nursery care for when I do go back to work (I was lucky in that I was in a position to be at home with him for the first couple of years and do realise that others are not so fortunate), which was why I was interested in the programme in the first instance.

I think perhaps my rose-tinted spectacles have been knocked off and it made me actually realise that my little boy will be meeting other kids who might try to bully him, etc. and who do not interact with other kids well. Hopefully, I will be able to prepare him for what lies ahead, but it is a worrying thought.

I do agree that all kids are gifts (mine especially so - we waited a long time for him!) and that they should enjoy the lovely innocence of childhood as long as possible.

Any guidance from more experienced Wiki Mums most appreciated!

Sorry for waffling, but I can't always find the right words to say what I'm thinking.

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#927666 - 12th Feb 2015 11:21am Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
granny Offline

Wiki Master

Registered: 29th Jun 2011
Posts: 13848
Loc: Wirral
No worries, we sometimes expect little children to be more mature than they really are capable of being. That is our lack of understanding.

The way we bring up our children is an individual's decision, but I suspect that once the babies go to nursery then that is mostly taken out of the parents hands.

If we wish for a perfect child, we have to be perfect ourselves. My suggestion would be not to get too stressed about things and if your little boy wants to jump up and down in puddles, let him, if he wants to dig mud, let him, and if he wants a biscuit at 4pm in the afternoon, let him. What harm can it do ? Better to say yes rather than no and have him cry until you change your mind. That's when he's controlling you !
If he wants to put his fingers in the electrical sockets, or his slipper down the toilet, then that's a 'no' !
Good Luck Christo.......
_________________________
...and those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.FN

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#927669 - 12th Feb 2015 11:36am Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: granny]
derekdwc Online   content


Forum Veteran

Registered: 13th Oct 2008
Posts: 4972
Loc: Birkenhead
Originally Posted By: granny
No worries, we sometimes expect little children to be more mature than they really are capable of being. That is our lack of understanding.

When it comes to toys for babies I think parents/grandparents tend to buy too many.
My youngest grandson, 1 this month has a load, but now he's started to walk all he is interested in is kicking a ball (in training to be a well paid soccer player one day - hopefully)and finding things to chew on.



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Edited by derekdwc (12th Feb 2015 11:39am)

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#927723 - 12th Feb 2015 3:13pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: granny]
Christo Offline
Enthusiast

Registered: 3rd Apr 2010
Posts: 113
Loc: Eastham
You have hit the nail on the head there, Granny - down to my complete lack of understanding (both of kids and others' ways of parenting!).

I do try to be fairly relaxed with my little boy (except, as you say, if he were to put himself or someone else in any imminent danger and usually a "no" or 'the look' is enough to detract from what he is about to do). Muddy puddles, leaf-kicking, mud-pie making and generally being a kid is actively encouraged - learning and having fun, discovering life for yourself all go hand-in-hand, along with the bumps and bruises associated. You don't get that with an iPad! (or am I just showing my age now?!)

I do try not to wrap him in cotton wool too much - luckily, I was brought up with brothers so know what they get up to!

I think I just need to take a little chill pill and just be there as/when he needs me! Fear of the unknown (nursery), perhaps?

Thank you for the Good Luck wishes - I need all the help I can get!

Derek, I wholeheartedly agree about them getting too much - our little fella gets a bit overwhelmed by it all and will sit happily for ages playing with the boxes, wrapping paper, etc.

Adorable piccy of your grandchildren, by the way.

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#927762 - 12th Feb 2015 8:07pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
cools Offline
Forum Addict

Registered: 16th Aug 2013
Posts: 1583
Loc: Wirral
Lovely photo Derek. My grandson has loads of toys but the one thing he wants if I forget and leave within his reach, tv remotes and mobile phone. He is 14months old and I try to trick him by giving him an old remote and phone, no chance he knows. The kids these days will be so clued into all technology even before they are 5. Makes me feel even more of a dinasour!

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#927946 - 13th Feb 2015 2:57pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: derekdwc]
snowhite Offline

Wiki Guide

Registered: 31st Jan 2014
Posts: 5648
Loc: Wirral
Originally Posted By: derekdwc
Originally Posted By: granny
No worries, we sometimes expect little children to be more mature than they really are capable of being. That is our lack of understanding.

When it comes to toys for babies I think parents/grandparents tend to buy too many.
My youngest grandson, 1 this month has a load, but now he's started to walk all he is interested in is kicking a ball (in training to be a well paid soccer player one day - hopefully)and finding things to chew on.

Your grandsons are lovely.Love them little dimples when he smiles. smile

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#927998 - 13th Feb 2015 5:55pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
fish5133 Online   content
Forum Master

Registered: 22nd Mar 2010
Posts: 2810
Loc: Heswallish

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#927999 - 13th Feb 2015 5:57pm Re: Secret Life of 4 Year Olds [Re: Christo]
snowhite Offline

Wiki Guide

Registered: 31st Jan 2014
Posts: 5648
Loc: Wirral
Aw isnt that just cute.
Thanks for sharing Fish smile

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