Forums Forums General Forums A - Z Lifestyle facebook

1. you say kids are being bullied into suicide, once again i come back to my point of the people you actually allow and are 'friends' with on there, only they are the ones you see on your timeline and if you have the necessary security settings then nobody other than friends can message you or post on your timeline.
2. "people talking crap" is a very subjective term, what is "crap" to you may not be to someone else, it all depends on which circles you run in.
3. good things it has done? it has let me keep in touch with friends and family all over the world (Canada, USA, New Zealand, Dubai, Japan) on a regular basis, we can see where each other has been via pictures, share stories, talk more often than we normally would and remain friends despite there being a vast world between us. It has re-united people with old friends, it has re-united people with lost belongings (jewellery etc), you can also meet new people and learn about other cultures because of it. Need i go on?


it's not a safe place if you let it become an unsafe place, i'm not saying watch every click and every keystroke they make, but once in a while, maybe when they're not looking, have a quick browse round, see what's on their timeline and discuss with them options if you don't like something. Punitive approaches won't work, colalborative and open discussions and education is the way forward.

i speak both from experience and where i work (CAMHS) we do a LOT of social media education for 0-16's and their parents and if you want i will happily come to your house and explain why facebook is not the devil.

facebook is just a 'thing' that you can utilise however you want, if you let it get out of hand and allow the wrong people in, then, much like in reality, you have nobody to blame but yourself for how it ends up. Use it properly and only allow people you know/like to message you etc then it's happy days.

of course kids being kids will accept everyone and hormones and stuff people will have arguments and i don't watch "jeremy kyle" with being in work all day but i can imagine 60%+ of the cases mention some form of social media being a catalyst... again, it doesn't make facebook the baddy, it just means that it was used inappropriately.

Do you allow your children to use it j_Demo, and how old are they ?

I don't have any children, i'm 25, and i have used it ever since i was about 16 (it was only founded in '04 when i was 15) and i've NEVER encountered any problems, nor has anyone i know.

jdemo, thank you for your in depth analysis of facebook however nothing you have said detracts from the fact that it is a dangerous place for kids. thanks for your kind offer to come to my house but really think that would not be a good idea. Have a nice evening. Ps Why did poor old Jeremy get dragged into this ?

your opinion is very much that, there is no categoric evidence that facebook is dangerous to/for kids and saying so means that sites like youtube and wikiwirral where people are free to post comments are equally as dangerous and harming and i'd bet you wouldn't think twice about letting your child watch videos on youtube or sign up to wikiwirral would you?

i'm going to take the ever-popular Justin Bieber as one prime example. I have just searched youtube for "Justin Bieber" which is what any prepubescent girl would do if given the option, and the following video's are on page 1 of the searches:
this is an official music video of his featuring half naked girls and alcohol
this video of his "worst moments"

i daren't even google search his name for what might come up (obviously the promoted stuff is top but what's after that is scary)

i think you should replace "facebook" with "the internet" because if you're that concerned about facebook then you'll be mortified about what else is on the internet outside of facebook, so take the computer/tablet/phone off your precious little child and let them go and play with a ball and a cup in the corner. the internet is a beautiful, tragic mess, it's amazing and dangerous, you have no choice but to take one without the other, there's absolutely no way you can filter all the good from all the bad, facebook is just one small cog in a massive machine. take it or leave it.

in relation to the very first post (as i'm aware we HAVE got a bit off topic) i would say let your child use facebook, but only when you feel that they're competent and educated enough to do so. there's no right or wrong answer re age.

My grandson has been on since he was about 12 but only on condition that his mum is also on his friends list so can see most of what is going on. It's a way of life for kids these days. If not Face Book there are all sorts of chat apps they use. You can't watch them 24 hours a day or monitor every single thing they do, the best you can do is teach them how to use these things safely, monitor them in the back ground without interfering as much as possible and above all chatting (not just talking) to your kids so they share things naturally.

Having a daughter in teaching, I can assure you that a couple of years ago, three school children in the Merseyside area committed suicide due to bullying by their so called school friends, on facebook. One child is too many and no child fits into a text book category. They are all different and all challenging, and until you have the wonderful experience of becoming a parent, you may not fully appreciate the worries and traumas that parents actually have to deal with, on a daily basis. Three children using facebook at the same time, could be a much harder practice to monitor. Monitoring three separate children every night on facebook, I should imagine is not likely to happen in the majority of cases. Therefore, my personal opinion is still much the same. If the age limit is 13yrs, and if children are able to join earlier, then the parents are not being responsible anyway and neither are those who purport it to be acceptable.

yes parents should be responsible for their kids & not let them roam the internet/facebook and then blame facebook, it's tantamount to letting a child play with a lion then blaming the lion for eating the child.

Also your point re bullying on facebook: the bullying probably almost certainly was happening outside of facebook it just wasn't dealt with appropriately by school/parents/police that it spilled over to facebook and got out of hand. Once again, if parents monitored facebook of either the perpetrators or victims then it could have been stopped. Mark Zuckerberg cannot take responsibility for that, parents/teachers/police should.

Come back to us when you have had a child j-demo.

Right to a point, but you should know that if bullying takes place in the school playground, the child being bullied is not likely to report it to anyone, for fear of being bullied more. They try to accommodate the perpetrators in an effort to feel as one of the crowd,....until it's gone too far.
Teacher's police and parents are not always knowledgeable about these things that go on. Oh ! and it was predominately happening on facebook, from behind the keyboard.

I would hate to be a teenager in this day and age.

cop out phrase that.

Just becauae i'm not a parent doesnt mean i have no idea what i'm talking about.

I don't think Rude was implying that you don't know what you are talking about, but maybe you don't fully understand the worries of being a parent.

Google "Facebook bullying" and you'll see the evidence.

think about this
you let your kid go on facebook so he adds his family and friends from school mates

so he posts something on his wall who will see it? there's his family and everyone on their list his school mates and people on their list YES YOU CAN STOP PEOPLE SEE WHAT YOU POST but what kid do you know that doesn't went to brag to mate lol one day he post a pic with his family on a day out ( I know who cares) but kids in school see it and start joking about it, then one of them thinks I'll troll him about it.

ps this is a what if just to make you think