Our Success is in our members who value our strength as a valued community.
Forum Statistics
Forums65
Topics76,347
Posts1,033,259
Members14,550
Most Online16,551
Feb 2nd, 2024
Who's Online Now
9 members (3 invisible), 10,089 guests, and 527 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Top Posters
sunnyside 45,164
MattLFC 22,315
Mark 21,269
granny 17,788
_Ste_ 16,345
Newest Members
JohnC, Luke2307, jharwood, TamTam, mrbigglesworth
14,550 Registered Users
New General Forums
Do we need Trident?
by derekdwc - 20th Jan 2016 1:11pm
New Wirral History
Tall Brick Chimneys
by diggingdeeper - 16th Mar 2024 11:56am
D.I.Y. / Building Shop
by mharford91 - 3rd Mar 2024 8:53pm
Looking for Joneses
by Markjon88 - 11th Apr 2019 7:06am
1970's Murder in Central Park, Wallasey
by cutespam - 4th Aug 2018 10:28am
Oleo Works
by Ducko - 14th May 2008 3:09pm
Top Posters(30 Days)
granny 15
casper 14
bri445 4
Topic Replies
This is Elvis
by GingerTom - 17th Mar 2024 2:37pm
Tall Brick Chimneys
by diggingdeeper - 16th Mar 2024 12:20pm
Gaza
by granny - 15th Mar 2024 10:13pm
Get your Money Tree ready
by StellaSimmons - 11th Mar 2024 11:50am
D.I.Y. / Building Shop
by bri445 - 4th Mar 2024 5:54pm
Xbox
by TudorBlue - 3rd Mar 2024 8:48pm
Restaurant/pub with outdoor seating - Bromborough
by Abakumss - 2nd Mar 2024 3:52pm
Oleo Works
by diggingdeeper - 1st Mar 2024 11:51pm
Wiper mechanism needed
by Gibbo - 28th Feb 2024 12:29pm
March
M T W T F S S
1 2 3
4 5 6 7 8 9 10
11 12 13 14 15 16 17
18 19 20 21 22 23 24
25 26 27 28 29 30 31
Top Likes Received (30 Days)
casper 1
Top Likes Received
bert1 14
Mark 4
granny 3
casper 3
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Awesome
Wiki Master
OP Offline
Awesome
Wiki Master
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
"A police force launched a Christmas 'drink-drivel' campaign today - warning that too much boozing will leave revellers lost for words.

Officers in Ipswich, Suffolk, listed phrases that are 'absolutely impossible' to say when drunk, including 'Good evening, officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?'.

The poster campaign lists 'innovative', 'preliminary' and 'cinnamon' as words that are difficult to say in an inebriated state.

And 'specificity, 'passive-aggressive disorder' and 'transubstantiate' are classed as very difficult to master.

But, according to the poster, the nine 'absolutely impossible' phrases for drunks are:

* Thanks, but I don't want to sleep with you;
* Oh, I just couldn't - no one wants to hear me sing;
* Sorry, but you're not really my type;
* No kebab for me, thank you;
* I'm not interested in fighting you;
* Good evening, officer, isn't it lovely out tonight?;
* Thank you, but I won't make any attempt to dance, I have no rhythm;
* Where is the nearest toilet? I can't possibly vomit in the street;
* I must be going home now - I have work in the morning

Inspector Becky Kidd-Stanton, operations inspector for Ipswich, said: 'The drink-drivel poster campaign appeals to people to come to Ipswich to have a good time and not to spoil it for others.

'It highlights how people behave differently after consuming alcohol.'

Police are also handing out 900 lollipops as part of their attempt to tackle festive disorder.

'It is harder to verbally abuse or fight with people with a lollipop in your mouth or hand,' said Ms Kidd-Stanton."


I like that last bit about lollipops. Let's see who has trouble with 'specificity, 'passive-aggressive disorder' and 'transubstantiate' after this evening!! smile

Google Ads
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,002
Wiki Master
Offline
Wiki Master
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 12,002
Maybe they should hand lollipops out as you leave any club / pub at anytime of the year.... think

....Actually, I see an evolution of that being another problem by way of people getting a beating by lollipop raftl



What If There Were No Hypothetical Questions?
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,488
AlfaHolic
Forum Veteran
Offline
AlfaHolic
Forum Veteran
Joined: Apr 2006
Posts: 5,488
LolliPop in the eye...

Stuy youve stated something here..you should be proud. A form of aggression that Toddlers can enjoy as well..


[Linked Image]

------------------------------------------------------------
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Forum Addict
Offline
Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
hmmm...im sure you could class a lolipop as an offensive weapon...made or adapated to cause harm or injury?
come here sonny your nicked...


Mustang
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Awesome
Wiki Master
OP Offline
Awesome
Wiki Master
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
You could bite it into a sharp point and stab someone in the face with it!!

depends how big they are - if it was one of these:
[Linked Image]
that would be good - chav silencer!
but then you'll get the chav females trying to do this:
[Linked Image]
whether they have 20lb of cellulite on their thighs or not!

Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Forum Addict
Offline
Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
eeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuugh...i cant just see that happening on conway street


Mustang
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,888
Forum Master
Offline
Forum Master
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,888
blimey, that isn't a good thought!

as for the lollipop thing, wot if ppl do get into a fight with a lollipop in their mouth? surely it increases their risk of choking? - brilliant! haha

Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Forum Addict
Offline
Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Originally Posted by Davey_Martin
blimey, that isn't a good thought!

as for the lollipop thing, wot if ppl do get into a fight with a lollipop in their mouth? surely it increases their risk of choking? - brilliant! haha


they will just sue plod for millions then...you can just see it now...quote"""cuz it wasnt him..he is a lovely lad. He wouldn't harm anyone. It wasn't him. He is a hero. He's a hero around here. All the lads love him around here. It was the bizzies' fault. They saw it coming. But they didn't do anything to stop it. They just let it carry on""""


Mustang
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,888
Forum Master
Offline
Forum Master
Joined: Jul 2007
Posts: 2,888
LOL!

Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 5,683
Wiki Guide
Offline
Wiki Guide
Joined: Dec 2003
Posts: 5,683
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...


"C20 LET bang"
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Awesome
Wiki Master
OP Offline
Awesome
Wiki Master
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Damn it - I forgot to test saying any of the big complicated words last night! I had texting trouble instead. One of my messages to my other half read, 'I am gettigoi a leban' - which when translated means 'I am getting a kebab' and another which stated, 'I am in the clipper getting ripped as a duck'. smack

Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Forum Addict
Offline
Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Originally Posted by Station
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...

and whats that meant to mean?.......


Mustang
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Awesome
Wiki Master
OP Offline
Awesome
Wiki Master
Joined: Jul 2008
Posts: 10,000
Originally Posted by Auditastic
Originally Posted by Station
When did the police get a sense of humour? They're so funny ...

and whats that meant to mean?.......

After your explanation of a recent apprehension of a man with a knife I truly believe police officers can have a sense of humour doh

Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
Forum Addict
Offline
Forum Addict
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 1,113
haha...warped yes it may be...but some of us escaped the humor removal screening process in training....


Mustang
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 8,620
H4H County Volunteer
Wiki Veteran
Offline
H4H County Volunteer
Wiki Veteran
Joined: Aug 2008
Posts: 8,620
You certainly did!!! I'll never look at a car door the same way again raftl


Sometimes Police Officers give more than just speeding tickets!

It�s hard to be fit as a fiddle when you�re shaped like a cello!

Moderated by  Mod 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Random Wirral Images

Click to View Topic.
Newest Topics
Tall Brick Chimneys
by diggingdeeper - 16th Mar 2024 11:56am
D.I.Y. / Building Shop
by mharford91 - 3rd Mar 2024 8:53pm
Xbox
by TudorBlue - 3rd Mar 2024 8:48pm
Possible Cause of Dementia
by diggingdeeper - 22nd Feb 2024 2:08am
Wiper mechanism needed
by Peter0787 - 20th Feb 2024 4:07pm
For Sale & Free
This is Elvis
by GingerTom - 17th Mar 2024 2:37pm
Member Spotlight
TheComputerLab
TheComputerLab
Wallasey
Posts: 1,315
Joined: May 2011
Today's Birthdays
There are no members with birthdays on this day.
New Wirral Info
Get your Money Tree ready
by keef666 - 22nd Mar 2023 12:27pm
Restaurant/pub with outdoor seating - Bromborough
by CarterUSM - 7th Aug 2020 7:59pm
Floral pavilion promo code?
by TheComputerLab - 31st Dec 2018 2:11pm
News : New Topics
Gaza
by diggingdeeper - 29th Oct 2023 9:28am
New Enthusiast Forums
Xbox
by TudorBlue - 3rd Mar 2024 8:48pm
Possible Cause of Dementia
by diggingdeeper - 22nd Feb 2024 2:08am
Wiper mechanism needed
by Peter0787 - 20th Feb 2024 4:07pm
Popular Topics(Views)
5,067,096 WIKI WALK CHAT
4,011,053 Spotted!
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5